Big E

Big E is a silly kid, this is his face after I told him he was wearing Pixie's sandle...


I asked him what he was up to?











He said, "I want to dance!"

So he Danced... Can you tell who he sees dancing all the time? (Could it be Pixie?)
After he figured he was done with Pixies shoe and dancing, he wanted to play out side. This is him after he got himself ready. He couldn't see why he couldn't go play in the snow dressed like that:)

Oh, Grandpa:)

To know me you would also have to know my family. I will start with my Mother's Father. Growing up in a family where "Dad" was nothing more than a title. I became close to my Grandfather.
Grandpa really filled the void that I had in my heart, in a sense he was my Dad:) I have so many wonderful childhood memories with both my Grandma and Grandpa. However, I will leave those stories for another day.

Unfortunately my Grandpa has been able to do nothing more than lay in bed for the past 15 months. It has been hard to see him fade away day by day. Sometimes I wonder why he has to suffer like he is. However, I can also see the many marvelous blessings that have come because he is still here with us.
My Grandfather was never a talker, he always let my Grandmother do the talking and story telling. Grandpa may not have said much but I always could feel the deep love he has for me. He always called me "puddin" a silly nick name but to me I felt special. Now that Grandpa can't do much he has become a talker. I have really enjoyed this new experience. Sure it is hit and miss depending on the day if you will actually have a conversation with a coherent Grandpa. None the less I love to hear his voice even if he is in a whole other world than the rest of us, most of the time.
Sad to say, but he does say some pretty entertaining stuff. Like, one day he kept going on about how needed to close the hatch in his bed where all his pooh goes. (Mind you he is just in a regular hospital bed) the reason being because there were goblins down there biting his behind. I know that is kinda gross, but it got a laugh out of me to hear my Grandpa talk like that. I got to give it to him I think he is on to some kind of new invention. I mean really there has to be something better than diapers, right?
A few nights ago he shouted out in the middle of the night. "Can somebody come help me before it's too late?" I ran as fast as I could to see what had happened. Only to find him safe in bed pointing to the corner of the room. I asked him what was wrong and he said "Quick turn on the light, there are three little kids in that corner who are trying to rob me." I indulge him and turned on the light. He continued to say "well now they have gone because you are here!" Other times he goes on about how there are a bunch of ants on the ceiling, so I go around the room with a empty spray bottle to take care of those pesky ants for him.
Another common thing is how he believes he is in a trailer instead of his home. So he is always trying to get out of bed to hook up the trailer to his truck so he can go home. (He was a truck driver for 33 years)Other times he wants me to hook his bed to the truck so he can go home. Can you imagine the sight of that? A old man in his bed, bed hitched to the back of the truck being towed down the street? That makes me chuckle every time.

I know that I am not the only one with stories like these. I often wonder if elderly people kinda loose there mind so they don't have to live in reality thinking about how they are stuck in bed in pain all the time. I think that it is wonderful that my grandfather believes he went walking in the mountains this morning. That he went to work yesterday. That the troops he knew in the war drooped him off at home. That he was in Idaho a couple weeks ago. And come to find out he was going to visit me in jail two months ago. Why I was in jail I don't know? but hey, he was coming to visit me:)
If he is willing to play along with me I like to talk about all the journeys we have been on or are going to take. Like a safari to the deepest reaches of Africa. Or taking a dive in the ocean surrounded by dolphins. Or flying a plane around the world. Where ever we want to go we can go right from his bedroom and be back in time for supper:)
Most of the time he tells me I'm crazy, or he falls asleep on me. But I know that if I tell him stories he gets his mind off of what ever was troubling him and is able to relax.

One night I sang him a hymn. Families Can Be Together Forever. I can't sing well at all. But you know he stayed awake to hear me sing and never took his eyes off mine. It was such a touching moment. I knew that I was reaching Grandpa, My grandpa! I know he's still in there. And for a moment I felt like I was his "little puddin" again:)
I love my Grandpa so very much and I am so grateful for this time I have to spend with him:) A even sweeter picture is to see my little ones give him a hug and kiss. They love their "papa" too. (that is what they call him)

Inspiration, just at the right time

I have the wonderful privilege to teach the Primary CTR 6 class along with my sweetie. It is exactly that, a privilege. Yet, sometimes I get off track just a hair and forget that.
Maybe one week I will wake up Sunday morning and quickly read over my lesson having done no other preparation and hope for the best. I know that with out fail every time I do that, my awesome little class suffers. I can tell that those lessons where I am nose deep in the manual are the lessons where the spirit is not in our classroom. My kids are wiggly and talking to one another. And when we leave that classroom I know that I have failed them, they didn't hear a word I said.
In light of receiving a new primary presidency. We had our first 5th Sunday, Teacher Meeting. Our new presidency talked over what their vision is which I thought was fantastic! More importantly I really needed to hear them talking about what primary is really about. That is teaching the Children the Gospel. It was a reminder that I am entrusted with these precious souls who are getting their first taste of the Gospel. Just as we are so excited to give our own children their first taste of something sweet or what ever it may be. We should have that same excitement for giving them there first taste of the Gospel and make it something worth tasting! something that they will want to come back for more, again and again.
Thinking about our Savior if he came to visit a Church meeting, he would not be with the High Priests. No! he would be with the Children.

What a awesome calling I have to teach these beautiful children each and every week. I love to see the enthusiasm for learning. For hearing the stories in the scriptures. Learning that we are here on Earth for a reason and we are not alone and he answers our prayers. That we can be together Forever as a family. That Our Father which is in Heaven Loves us beyond our comprehension, that he sent his only begotten son to provide the way back to Him. What a wonderful blessing the Gospel is.

I have been reminded that our Father in Heaven makes it possible to heal All things. Wither it is financial difficulties, loss of a loved one or having a rambunctious kid. No matter what may be in our way, keeping us from being our best self. We can overcome it, He can heal us.

I know that if I focus on being repaired each any every Sunday to teach my class. To be thinking about the lesson all week long instead of for just a few minutes. The inspiration will come, I will be able to know what my kids need to hear. I will be able to teach with the spirit and they will be able to feel the spirit burn within there hearts. I know if I read from the scripture, though they may not understand everything I know that they will feel something. I know that if we are taught in our youth and are given the opportunity to have that witness, they will have a foundation and something to fall on when they are faced with temptation. And if they do fall they will come back. What a awesome thing that is.

Children are truely magnificent, it is no wonder that the Father asks us to be like little children.
I know that when I have the spirit with me teaching my class the children are the ones teaching me. What a wonderful thing, each and every Sunday I have the opportunity to be just a little better than I am through them.

Today was another testament that prayers are answered and they are answered in just the right way at just the right time.

I can do better

Now that I have gotten a taste for blogging and have had the privilege to visit other blogs that are absolutely a delight to read. I find myself thinking to myself, I can do better than the few posts I have created. I mean wow! I had no idea what you can do with a blog and how fun it can be. That's not even the best part, I think that blogging each and everyday will help me to grow in more ways than I'm sure I am even aware of. Number one right now is the excitement I have in being able to improve my writing skills. After all there is no better way to do that than to practice at it everyday.
I thought about redoing my entire blog and start from scratch. but I thought it would be a great way too look back and hopefully see some improvement if I continue from here and if I'm fortunate maybe even find a better me.

That is something I can do

Why with every new year we tend to look at all the things we have left undone and didn't accomplish. Focusing on all the negative we see within ourselves? Nearly all of us make new years resoulutions and ask friends and family nearly everyone we know what their resoulutions are for this "new beginning." In the end aren't we all confessing what we feel our faults are? What we failed at the past year, what we dispise about ourselves? But with high hopes of making this new year better than the last?
Sure there is nothing wrong with setting goals to better ourselves. But for those who are like me, we create a huge list of all the things we see wrong in our life. Lets face it, if we choose to go down that path that list can get pretty hefty!
Never in my life have I ever been able to say that I accomplished all of my goals no matter how determined I thought I was. Come to think of it I must confess I never have accomplished a single thing that was on my monster of a list, EVER! If fact the bitter truth is, here it is just at the close of January and I have already lost sight of my goals I made just a few weeks ago.
I'm thinking why do we do this to ourselves? Why do we set ourselves up for failure and ugly guilt? I know I already feel that guilt bubbling inside me making me feel like a horrible person because I can't even be the person I feel that I should be. Or break those bad habits or build good habits for even one month!
Now I have to pause. Am I really that terrible? With all honesty the answer is NO! Why then, do I everyday try tierlessly to convince myself that I really am a horrible Mother...Wife...Friend...and Neighbor?
It all comes down to that list I have in my head. The ugly me that I see. What if instead of trying to be the perfect, gorgious woman I expect myself to be I decide to be the real me?

Instead of setting myself up for failure and guilt. I am going to chuck the idea of news years resolutions and focus on Today. Only today!What can I do today to make it better or more manageable than yesterday? After all it is in the small things that add up to great things isn't it?
Maybe the flaw is in thinking that I can some how change all that I dislike about me in one year, one month,even in one day. Maybe all I need to do is start each day with the intent to make today better than the last. Even if all I manage is to have the house a little cleaner, to have a more nutrishious meal, to have all the beds made before bed time or to even brush my hair or put on some lipstick.
Maybe by being me the real me. Just me with all her flaws and imperfections. Knowing that I have a long way to go but my potential is endless. Knowing that it is okay if I have those bad days, those monnmy break downs. Days were I feel hopeless. The truth is none of us can escape being imperfect, that is why we are here to learn and grow. To taste the bitter so we can know the sweetness and joy on life.
Just maybe by working on today each and everyday I will allow that beautiful woman I know that I am show herself and shine from time to time. And at the end of the year I can look back and see all the progress I have made:)
Thinking of just today, before the lights go out and I retire to sleep. What good can I do today?
Now that is something I can do.

December 7th A couple of days after this picture was taken we had about 18 inches of snow fall in one night on top of what you see here. We spent 7 hours straight shoveling snow out of the houses that did not have roofs on them yet. LOADS of fun!

December 6th, A view from the living room. The kitchen will be right there in front, the master bedroom is behind the kitchen. So wonderful to see all the walls done!

December 6th, A view from the laundry room, looking into the kitchen and dining area. Window looking into the backyard

December 6th,View from the kitchen looking into the guest bathroom and Eden's room.:)
Living room is in front of Edens room.

November 22nd Big E checkin things out.

Pixie is a little bit afraid of heights, meanwhile Big E wanted to jump out!

Big E is excited this time because now it looks more like a house and so much more to do and
explore. Building the interior walls was a lot of fun too:)

Sitting in the master window.

November 16th Sweets and I after a long 12 hour day working on the houses!

We are done for the day YAY! It's getting pretty cold!

Once again Pixie is so happy to see our house, even standing in the mud in our back yard!

Big E was more interested in putting his car in his pocket. What a hansome fella he is:)

Why this wall you say? I built it, header to the door and all=D BOOYAH!

Walls, glorious walls!

November 1st, Lovin it!exterior walls=D

October 25th,Pixie and Big E running aroung on our floor. There's where our future stairs will be to the basment=D

Big E wasn't too sure what we were doing there???

Pixie was more than excited, she thought it was so fun to run around on our new floor:)

There she be:) Laying floors down is my most favorite part of the whole framing process. I can say that now since I am a little slow getting my blog going and now we are done framing. YIPPEE!

September 27th,Yay! our foundation is poured!!! It almost looks like a house:)

Progress on our House:)

Back in Feb 2009 "Sweets"(the hubby) and I decided that we would be part of a Self-Help program building our own house with help of the 6 other families that would be partcipating in the program as well. We all help build each others house and we all move in when they are all done. We finally got started on this huge project by the end of August. Come September 2nd, we saw some progress on our lot:)

In this pic you can see Sweets and Pixie (our oldest) standing by the outline of our house ready to be dug so our foundation can be poured. The lines you are looking at are of the pop out in the back of the house where our french doors will be:) We were so excited to see something happening:)